I'm a single mother of 3. 2 girls, 6 & 7 ; 1 son, 10. I am unemployeed. I have a felony on my record from when I was 17 yrs old. It's been so hard to find a good job. I am also suffering from depression. I can't sleep at night but can barely get out of bed. I cry eveyday for nothing & everything. I'm not very educated. My son has a learning disability & I am no help to him when it comes to helping him with his homework. He's in danger of having to repeat the 5th grade. He's so upset about that. He's constantly teased & picked on. He has a online tutor but our computer is so old it runs sooooooo slow & is about to crash. He can never finish his lessons & he gets so frustrated. We live off of $262/mo in child support. We're on section 8 & because I'm not working they pay our rent but our utilities are constantly disconnected. My son's father hasn't been in his life since he was 3yrs old & my daughters father is in prison. Me & my youngest daughter have asthma & are always sick. I have no money at all for Christmas. I get so heart broken every time one of my kids tell me something they want for Christmas. they're such good kids & deserve evrything they want & need. I just can't provide it. I feel like a bad mother. I have thoughts of suicide EVERYDAY!!!! But everytime I think of taking my own life I think of my kids finding me dead & they don't deserve that. They already don't have thier fathers what would they do without a mother too!?! And I do love them dearly. I couldn't image life without them. They are the only reason I DO get out of bed. I just wish I could snap out of this depression, get a good job & give them a good life. They deserve that. But I feel so helpless, hopeless, lonely, sad, mad, stupid, unstable, awful & like a terrible parent. I need help. I feel I'm losing it. Please someone help me & MY KIDS!!!
